You're My Beloved

Recently, the picture of a lamb having wandered off from the rest of the flock and the shepherd upon finding it breaks its leg has been coming to mind. I see myself so much like that lamb. Persistent in seeking its own desire/passion.  :( Thank you Jesus for seeking after me and not quitting till I was safe and secure in your arms again. I am not sorry that my Precious Savior saw it fit to break ‘my leg’. Didn’t David say, it is a good thing that I have been chastened?

Really think this is the first time in which I’ve been insurmountably grateful for this favor.  It is a blessed thing to weep over ones sins and have a broken and contrite heart before God.

Ever since the Lord used a friend to see me through this season life has not been the same. Neither would I want it to be. There’s been a tenderness to be mindful of my Redeemer and a constant acknowledgement of His presence. I have no desire to wander off again. My heart belongs to Jesus and Jesus alone. There is nothing, NOTHING I say, which could detour me from my precious quest. My Jesus is become all the more precious to me. It is as though Christian was accompanied by Faithful. Or as Ruth to Naomi.

I am extremely excited as to this new level of ground He is leading towards! I can’t stop smiling! And the joy that has been given is so overwhelming at times…it makes me want to cry. I am learning a deeper delight in abiding in Him. ..there's nothing more which is appealing than to hear His voice reassure me that I am His regardless what I've done...what Jesus has done for me ultimately surpasses it all!

‘Beloved’ has been speaking volumes. I still want to ask, but why do you still love me, Jesus? Why do you choose to forgive once more? …After all I’ve done? Just contemplating life again causes tears to well up. No, I shall not stray again. I am my Lover’s and I am His Beloved. He amazes me more and more.

Writing this doesn’t do justice to what God is/has done in my heart! The only thing I can say is He is beyond awesome. This newness of heart and soul is sometimes scary.  Lord Jesus, Your tender mercies are so overwhelming! How shall I express my gratitude?! I keep thinking that it is all a dream. That I shall wake up to a horrid life and be totally disillusioned.  Just as that lamb with a broken leg must be carried near it’s master’s breast and as Mary washing, wiping and anointing Jesus’ feet so I am learning to find delight in Him alone! Thank you, Jesus! I'm coming running home to You!